don't be afraid to step out of line

just stop talking to me.
i never want to see you again in my life.



stop breathing my air.

everything in my life has totally changed. i don't know if it's good or bad yet. i'm waiting silently. i do know one thing though;
I'M LEAVING OUT OF WEST VIRGINIA ON THIS ONE DAY

you've been chasing me down,
waiting for something to bend.
i've been lost now i'm found.
saving the tide to your heart.
i'm taking the hard road.
i never feel anymore.
let me come down easy,
let me be reborn.
have some faith in this life.
going through windows & doors.
but the seasons may change.
& i've never felt so alone.
i'm taking the hard road.
i never feel anymore.
let me com down easy,
let me be the one.
i've got one love on my mind.
try to get to heaven if i've go the time.
i fear something i can't deny,

in your name. i can't eat. how do you do this to me? these days are turning to blurs. my day's & nights are meshing. i can not tell my dreams from reality. sick.

now lets see if your magic is real.

the only down fall of me NOT being in school is no all-county. :(

so i'm not in school anymore but i'm getting my GED. :)
keep fingers crossed.

beautiful sickness give me your sickness. please?

your sickness is beautiful. like a plague, it over takes me. covering every inch oh my body. then you leave. i'm left cold, shaking on the ground. come back. i need you to live. sadly, i need you to live.

have you seen the love of my life? she is missing & i don't know what to do without her.

all i ever want is you. yes that is true. but till then there's school & i break all the rules. i wish i could change my ways. will you help me today? thinking of your face, a ghost to me, the world fades. i don't know when it happened. i don't know if it will change. but you have all of me baby & i hope i have all of you too.

i'm drowning in my sea
of lost memories
then i hear you call
my middle name
it stings

hate is all i feel from the people around me. but if they only knew that i would break the back of love for them. so it must be in the water. the lies they have filled in their heads about me. i can't apologize for something not there. i can't take this much longer. just pour the misery down baby, pour it down on me.

okay i know i mess up everything. don't remind me & i love you too. why can't i do anything right? time to get ready or smoke a cigarette? desicions desicions.

my head is pounding from lack of sleep & too many cigarettes. i'm just sitting here counting down the minutes for teenage wasteland to begin. energy drinks here i come. oh how i hate them. but if i want to survive the grind today, i must find my energy in a can. i'm going to be idle all day with thoughts of you on my mind anyways. so why not continue this game i play with myself. it's what keeps me hanging on. there has to be pain, or i will cause conflicts for us. i would rather hurt myself then us. god how i need to stop hurting us. he only knows the pain i have put you through. there are no apologize needed. just change. yes, watch me change into a fly for you to pull off my wings. you don't mean too. i'm to blame. change is needed indeed.

it's 4:55. you're on my mind.
the sandman must have forgotten about me. but who needs sleep anyways,
when i have you as my daydream.

i desire a friend more than anything, i desire a love, i desire safety-
but, i can't grow a new heart. so don't go breaking it.♥

& since you've gone away
my love has chased another day
away from me
& now i'm learning
what the world is like without you
i can hardly see
what it's worth to me

i'm such a silly girl. love pours out my veins for him. why can't i just make him happy? do what he wants? no, of course i can't. that would make life to easy for me. for us. why must i continue on making things worse? why do i get this highness from the pain i cause? i see tears are yet to come. but in the end i know i need him. i'll stay with him till my bones rot away to nothing. but if he'll have me.

last night was unforgettable. for the only one i would die for was in my arms. i felt so helpless & small pushed up against him. my body melted away with each breath he took. the words i love you seemed to pour out of my mouth. those words never felt so real in my life.